Thoughts on Father's Day
Our children are a heritage,A blessing from the Lord;They bring a richness to our lives—In each, a treasure stored. —Fasick
Years ago, before I settled down and became a father to two wonderful kids, I always had this sense of ambivalence whenever Father’s Day is celebrated.
The meaning of fatherhood has never presented itself on me as I reached puberty. When I was a teenager trying to grasp the meaning of so many things, Fatherhood is only a word that probably gazed at my being – it feigned to be there – only, it wasn’t there.
But I believe fatherhood was given to me, first and foremost, to dispel any negative notions I had about the term itself. It was a gift that I was blessed to receive. Even if fatherhood is sometimes a tightrope walk, I wouldn’t exchange it for anything in the world. It was like God telling me, your earthly father might have abandoned you, but now is the time for you to make your mark on your kids’ lives…it is not easy, but it pays to traverse with them side by side, if not to be there with them in the end, at least see that they are walking in a direction different from what you’ve taken.
That is why maybe I cannot imagine myself working far away from my family for longer periods of time. I cannot grasp the meaning of two persons getting tied up together and then separating in the name of brighter cash, brighter work. That is why, maybe, I never picture myself working in a distant land in the guise of bringing them the quintessential honey and bread, in the promise of securing for them a brighter future.
Maybe that’s why I’m also ambivalent about so many things – like the things that caused my earthly father to fly and move so far away from us at the prospect of investing gold to secure our future – a prospect that didn’t take place, a move that compromised the very essence of family and responsibility.
Early on, I decided that if ever I will be a father, I would be there not just to be called father, but to play the role – and let me tell you, I’m enjoying every minute of it! I see that we will not always be there for our children, but the least that we could do for now maybe is to make memories with them – those memories they will hinge on and cling to in the coming days of their lives when they themselves would try to figure out for themselves the meaning of the word, ‘father’.
Father’s Day now is always anticipated. Just this morning upon waking up, after greeting me “Papa, happy father’s Day!”, Belle showed me a PowerPoint presentation she did with Mama Joy in lieu of the printed card I always expect to receive from her. Later on after church, we met with my sister Ate But (my only sibling living here in Manila) and her husband Kuya Benjie and nephew Matty and celebrated Father’s Day at the Mall of Asia Savory Chicken Restaurant.
Later on Belle and Ivan and I browsed at the children’s section of Powerbooks. Saw a set of new titles, including fellow Kuting Becky Bravo’s Fetch. We went home at past five, feeling sticky and tired, especially after walking up at the wrong car park. But you know what? I couldn’t forget the ‘treat’ my family gave me on this special day; in fact, the only day other than my birthday I can truly call my own.
Let me share this devotional I just read from inspirational writer David H. Roper:
A friend of mine wrote recently, “If we died tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of days. But the family left behind would feel the loss for the rest of their lives. Why then do we invest so much in our work and so little in our children’s lives?”
Why do we sometimes exhaust ourselves rising up early and going late to rest, “eating the bread of anxious toil” (Ps. 127:1-2 esv), busying ourselves to make our mark on this world, and overlooking the one investment that matters beyond everything else—our children?
Solomon declared, “Children are a heritage from the Lord”—an invaluable legacy He has bequeathed us. “Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth” (v.4) is his striking simile. Nothing is more worthy of our energy and time.
There is no need for “anxious toil,” working night and day, the wise man Solomon proclaimed, for the Lord does take care of us (Ps. 127:2). We can make time for our children and trust that the Lord will provide for all of our physical needs. Children, whether our own or those we disciple, are our lasting legacy—an investment we’ll never regret.
Happy Father’s Day to everyone!
Years ago, before I settled down and became a father to two wonderful kids, I always had this sense of ambivalence whenever Father’s Day is celebrated.
The meaning of fatherhood has never presented itself on me as I reached puberty. When I was a teenager trying to grasp the meaning of so many things, Fatherhood is only a word that probably gazed at my being – it feigned to be there – only, it wasn’t there.
But I believe fatherhood was given to me, first and foremost, to dispel any negative notions I had about the term itself. It was a gift that I was blessed to receive. Even if fatherhood is sometimes a tightrope walk, I wouldn’t exchange it for anything in the world. It was like God telling me, your earthly father might have abandoned you, but now is the time for you to make your mark on your kids’ lives…it is not easy, but it pays to traverse with them side by side, if not to be there with them in the end, at least see that they are walking in a direction different from what you’ve taken.
That is why maybe I cannot imagine myself working far away from my family for longer periods of time. I cannot grasp the meaning of two persons getting tied up together and then separating in the name of brighter cash, brighter work. That is why, maybe, I never picture myself working in a distant land in the guise of bringing them the quintessential honey and bread, in the promise of securing for them a brighter future.
Maybe that’s why I’m also ambivalent about so many things – like the things that caused my earthly father to fly and move so far away from us at the prospect of investing gold to secure our future – a prospect that didn’t take place, a move that compromised the very essence of family and responsibility.
Early on, I decided that if ever I will be a father, I would be there not just to be called father, but to play the role – and let me tell you, I’m enjoying every minute of it! I see that we will not always be there for our children, but the least that we could do for now maybe is to make memories with them – those memories they will hinge on and cling to in the coming days of their lives when they themselves would try to figure out for themselves the meaning of the word, ‘father’.
Father’s Day now is always anticipated. Just this morning upon waking up, after greeting me “Papa, happy father’s Day!”, Belle showed me a PowerPoint presentation she did with Mama Joy in lieu of the printed card I always expect to receive from her. Later on after church, we met with my sister Ate But (my only sibling living here in Manila) and her husband Kuya Benjie and nephew Matty and celebrated Father’s Day at the Mall of Asia Savory Chicken Restaurant.
Later on Belle and Ivan and I browsed at the children’s section of Powerbooks. Saw a set of new titles, including fellow Kuting Becky Bravo’s Fetch. We went home at past five, feeling sticky and tired, especially after walking up at the wrong car park. But you know what? I couldn’t forget the ‘treat’ my family gave me on this special day; in fact, the only day other than my birthday I can truly call my own.
Let me share this devotional I just read from inspirational writer David H. Roper:
A friend of mine wrote recently, “If we died tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of days. But the family left behind would feel the loss for the rest of their lives. Why then do we invest so much in our work and so little in our children’s lives?”
Why do we sometimes exhaust ourselves rising up early and going late to rest, “eating the bread of anxious toil” (Ps. 127:1-2 esv), busying ourselves to make our mark on this world, and overlooking the one investment that matters beyond everything else—our children?
Solomon declared, “Children are a heritage from the Lord”—an invaluable legacy He has bequeathed us. “Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth” (v.4) is his striking simile. Nothing is more worthy of our energy and time.
There is no need for “anxious toil,” working night and day, the wise man Solomon proclaimed, for the Lord does take care of us (Ps. 127:2). We can make time for our children and trust that the Lord will provide for all of our physical needs. Children, whether our own or those we disciple, are our lasting legacy—an investment we’ll never regret.
Happy Father’s Day to everyone!
Labels: fatherhood, life, moi, musings
posted by Fernando R. Gonzalez @ 5:16 AM
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